Someone has written these beautiful words. One must read and try to understand the deep meanings in them. They are like the Ten Commandments to follow in life all the time.
1] Prayer is not a "spare wheel" that you pull out when in trouble; it is a "steering wheel" that directs us in the right path throughout life.
2] Do you know why a car's WINDSHIELD is so large & the rear view mirror is so small? Because our PAST is not as important as our FUTURE. So, look ahead and move on.
3] Friendship is like a BOOK. It takes few seconds to burn, but it takes years to write.
4] All things in life are temporary. If going well enjoy it, they will not last forever. If going wrong don't worry, they can't last long either.
5] Old friends are like Gold! New friends are Diamonds! If you get a Diamond, don't forget the Gold! Because to hold a Diamond, you always need a base of Gold!
6] Often when we lose hope and think this is the end, GOD smiles from above and says, "Relax, sweetheart, it's just a bend, not the end!
7] When GOD solves your problems, you have faith in HIS abilities; when GOD doesn't solve your problems HE has faith in your abilities.
8] A blind person asked St. Anthony: "Can there be anything worse than losing eye sight?" He replied: "Yes, losing your vision."
9] When you pray for others, God listens to you and blesses them; and sometimes, when you are safe and happy, remember that someone has prayed for you.
10] WORRYING does not take away tomorrow's TROUBLES; it takes away today's PEACE.
Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Friday, December 24, 2010
A Christmas Message
When I received this message from Dehyana, it is quite clear that this message is not just meant for me but for each and everyone of us.
The gift of forgiveness.
It is always so easy to say "I forgive" but have I really forgive to the extend that I can love the person once more?
"As I contemplate the deeper meaning of the birth of Jesus, I drop my mind down into my heart and let the Christ in Christmas be born in me.
It occurred to me this morning as I glanced at the headlines of our daily newspaper, that a life not centered on Christ is a life filled with longings and desires that can’t find their satisfaction in what this world offers. And it’s obvious as I listen to the endless stories of lives gone bad that each one of us carries way too much negativity in our hearts. As the holidays quickly approach, it is my hope that every person alive, regardless of their religious beliefs, takes part in the birthing of pure heart consciousness through a deep and profound willingness to forgive and forget. What a gift each of us can give to all people everywhere; the gift of total and complete forgiveness of this great illusion.
Christmas reminds us that the love of God incarnated and took a body as the one born in Bethlehem. Christ Jesus, wrapped in solar light, demonstrates the hope of glory hiding in each one of us. The Christ in you is eager to use you as the gift of redemption in this world. Are you willing? Do you want to walk the malls this holiday season and enjoy Christmas celebrations with family and friends without judgment, exhaustion, depression and anger? If so, keep the Christ in Christmas alive by forgiving everyone with a pure heart, regardless of past hurts or regrets. The story of Jesus being born on earth is the story of you being born as the son of man, only to rise as the Christ in God. Bethlehem is in you. The manger is in you as the Christ child, a pure heart, the innocent one, forgiveness incarnate, wrapped in the same solar sun of God’s infinite love!
In case you haven’t realized, we all face the same uncertainty about the future of our planet. There is far too much hatred in the world because there remains unforgivness in our hearts. Ask yourself this right now, “Who and what must I forgive?” If you want the redeemer to live in you, then you must release all negativity through radical forgiveness and give only love and acceptance. And if you wish to join with those of us who are working toward unity consciousness, please get out of your head and get into your heart this holiday season by keeping the Christ in Christmas. Forgive, forgive and forgive some more until you are grateful to God for your life and all things in it.
I invite each and every one of you to join with me as we make a conscious decision this holiday season to live always from our hearts. Merry Christmas to the Christ in each one of us, for we are the light of the world.
Ps. if you don’t know what to give someone this Christmas, stop thinking about what to buy them and simply show up as someone who has made a difference in their life!"
God Bless You,
Dehyana
The gift of forgiveness.
It is always so easy to say "I forgive" but have I really forgive to the extend that I can love the person once more?
"As I contemplate the deeper meaning of the birth of Jesus, I drop my mind down into my heart and let the Christ in Christmas be born in me.
It occurred to me this morning as I glanced at the headlines of our daily newspaper, that a life not centered on Christ is a life filled with longings and desires that can’t find their satisfaction in what this world offers. And it’s obvious as I listen to the endless stories of lives gone bad that each one of us carries way too much negativity in our hearts. As the holidays quickly approach, it is my hope that every person alive, regardless of their religious beliefs, takes part in the birthing of pure heart consciousness through a deep and profound willingness to forgive and forget. What a gift each of us can give to all people everywhere; the gift of total and complete forgiveness of this great illusion.
Christmas reminds us that the love of God incarnated and took a body as the one born in Bethlehem. Christ Jesus, wrapped in solar light, demonstrates the hope of glory hiding in each one of us. The Christ in you is eager to use you as the gift of redemption in this world. Are you willing? Do you want to walk the malls this holiday season and enjoy Christmas celebrations with family and friends without judgment, exhaustion, depression and anger? If so, keep the Christ in Christmas alive by forgiving everyone with a pure heart, regardless of past hurts or regrets. The story of Jesus being born on earth is the story of you being born as the son of man, only to rise as the Christ in God. Bethlehem is in you. The manger is in you as the Christ child, a pure heart, the innocent one, forgiveness incarnate, wrapped in the same solar sun of God’s infinite love!
In case you haven’t realized, we all face the same uncertainty about the future of our planet. There is far too much hatred in the world because there remains unforgivness in our hearts. Ask yourself this right now, “Who and what must I forgive?” If you want the redeemer to live in you, then you must release all negativity through radical forgiveness and give only love and acceptance. And if you wish to join with those of us who are working toward unity consciousness, please get out of your head and get into your heart this holiday season by keeping the Christ in Christmas. Forgive, forgive and forgive some more until you are grateful to God for your life and all things in it.
I invite each and every one of you to join with me as we make a conscious decision this holiday season to live always from our hearts. Merry Christmas to the Christ in each one of us, for we are the light of the world.
Ps. if you don’t know what to give someone this Christmas, stop thinking about what to buy them and simply show up as someone who has made a difference in their life!"
God Bless You,
Dehyana
Friday, November 5, 2010
To Robert Kot
Dear Robert,
I know I'm one day early but I'll be travelling tomorrow, so I'm writing to you now.
How the years have flown…
It’s been 6 years since you left. I thought it would be good to let you know how much I missed you and how often your name popped up in some of our conversations whenever ‘we’ meet up. ‘We’ are the Clinique alumnis.
Yes, you’ve left that indelible mark on our hearts.
I left company just about the time you went off to your heaven.
I’ve always wonder what would life be after Clinique because in the Lauder family, one is so protected, so pampered and so respected.
Not many, especially those who have worked for more than a decade would even dare to dream of leaving.
My existence there for two decades was a gigantic achievement or so I thought!
But I guess I’m also one who has always been seeking to experience something different.
Although I’m neither adventurous nor ambitious, I’m always curious.
Therefore, I went seeking for something more fulfilling but before I even discover what I’d really wanted, I landed with old Sue again. I helped her develop her businesses and don’t deny that I did gain a wealth of knowledge from all the businesses that she ventured in.
And of course, lessons which I’ve learned from you still stay intact.
They became a source of encouragement for me over the years.
For example, the company’s vision statement of Bringing The Best To Everyone We Touch became a personal motto for me as well.
Remember how you used to challenge me on staffs’ turnover and pressure me crazy over their productivity?
Honestly, I detested it and fought back with questions like, “Why don’t you pressure the HR manager? It’s also her responsibility as well!”
Deep down, only I alone will know the answer to my own question.
You’d wanted me to look beyond myself and grow.
You must've known that by the time I left Clinique, I had succeeded in controlling the turnover and the Brand was experiencing a double digit growth. It matters a lot to me at that time.
Some of the best friends I have now are my own staff, because you’ve inspired me to take it deeply from within and to serve them with the heart.
When I started with Sue, I didn’t leave those principles behind, I actually carried them along with me, much to the chagrin of my boss then.
Although he seemed to be a nice young chap, our working styles were completely different.
I could always feel negative energies from him. I don’t know. I just felt it and it was suffocating my soul.
I endured for 5 years and left.
I left with no regrets because I badly needed time to heal myself.
I need to learn how to let go….
I took a break and spent the last one and a half years, semi-working, reflecting and taking time to seek, to observe, to learn, to serve, to run and to dream a bit more than before. Basically, I need to realign myself back with nature.
Bits and pieces of my interesting encounters are shared in this blog.
Unlike some of my peers, I haven’t made much progress career wise, but I’m not worried. At some point in life, one needs to slow down and take stock of what we have in order to appreciate more.
It was good for me to look at the various aspects of life and learn.
Still learning…
I knew for sure what I wanted to do. I want to work in Hospis! Don’t ask me why. My heart just felt it.
The saying, ask and it shall be given….
Not so in my case, I asked but was rejected several times. I felt upset and discouraged.
Perhaps, it wasn’t meant for me after all.
Therefore, I’m now back to the retail industry which fortunately, I still do have some values. Haha! Friends commented that it is all fated because retail operation remains my forte – I can’t run away from it.
But then, retail no longer excites or drives me like it used to before.
Although the rewards are good but it is not the same as doing something after my own heart. Get the drift?
Guess what? I’m currently engaged with the Bonita Group Of Companies, reporting directly to the MD. He’s very kind man.
In some ways, he reminds me of you. I’m not joking!
Good business acumen, compassionate and down to earth.
But there’s one thing he is of no match to you; his attention to details. I guess you’ve set such high standards that made it so difficult for me to compare anyone with you. Perhaps, that’s the reason why I appear in his space.
Well, Robert. I don’t think I have the guts to tell you all these if you’re still my MD. But now, I’m writing it all down for you.
If you’re still around, I’ll be presenting to you my retail sales plan and we will be discusing about sales vs. target.
Funny, how we tend to talk more privately to people only when they are gone.
Sad, but I supposed life is like that.
Robert, do you remember how we panicked and got all stressed up over that Jeanette Wagner, Fred Langhammer and Leonard Lauder’s visits? Eeee…I certainly wouldn’t want to go through those nightmares again!
And I will also never forget the day when Steph and I were dragged to your office over an ad that we placed in The Star. We were forced to look at our own mistakes and when we couldn’t find it, you pointed out the flaws and taught us about attention to details all over again.
Your eye for details – no one in the company can escape from you!
Well, 6 years and many things have changed.
John and I had run a few more marathons.
Your daughters are all beautifully grown up. I’ve seen them every now and then in Annie’s facebook.
I met Mr. Loo briefly about 3 months ago and he is running Suria Meriang smoothly albeit the normal challenges.
Sue and Madam have both expanded their businesses and doing well.
The politics in this country are growing from bad to worse but you don’t need to know.
We’ve many more malls now and the cosmetics brands have increased 20 to 30 fold!
So are the competitions! It’s certainly not an easy market.
I believe as I mature my priorities change too. The things that are important to me right now are no longer the status, power or winning competitions.
It’s about living a life with love and humour. Love to understand and humour to endure.
It’s about learning to help the less fortunate.
It’s about leading with good intent of the heart.
This brought me back to some of the lessons which have been inspired by you.
You’ve taught me …
- The vision given and aims to aspire
- The pride of doing things well
- The attention to details
- The opportunities of responsibilities
- The power of perseverance
- To respect in order to gain respect
- To practice what we preach
- To deliver what we promise
Different phase in life, we do different things. And soon, I will be taking another leap of faith again.
By the time, I end this letter I already had a job offer from Hospis Malaysia and they are willing to wait for me to finish off my contract with Bonita until next year.
It is for me after all!!
Some people thought I am a bit ridiculous to opt out the security of a lucrative job and be surrounded by people who are terminally ill (directly or indirectly).
But I believe I will find meaning in my role in the palliative care services and the rewards will be much more than the salary package from both Clinique and Bonita put together.
I believe I'll be a better person too because I want to be a better person.
Miss you much...
I know I'm one day early but I'll be travelling tomorrow, so I'm writing to you now.
How the years have flown…
It’s been 6 years since you left. I thought it would be good to let you know how much I missed you and how often your name popped up in some of our conversations whenever ‘we’ meet up. ‘We’ are the Clinique alumnis.
Yes, you’ve left that indelible mark on our hearts.
I left company just about the time you went off to your heaven.
I’ve always wonder what would life be after Clinique because in the Lauder family, one is so protected, so pampered and so respected.
Not many, especially those who have worked for more than a decade would even dare to dream of leaving.
My existence there for two decades was a gigantic achievement or so I thought!
But I guess I’m also one who has always been seeking to experience something different.
Although I’m neither adventurous nor ambitious, I’m always curious.
Therefore, I went seeking for something more fulfilling but before I even discover what I’d really wanted, I landed with old Sue again. I helped her develop her businesses and don’t deny that I did gain a wealth of knowledge from all the businesses that she ventured in.
And of course, lessons which I’ve learned from you still stay intact.
They became a source of encouragement for me over the years.
For example, the company’s vision statement of Bringing The Best To Everyone We Touch became a personal motto for me as well.
Remember how you used to challenge me on staffs’ turnover and pressure me crazy over their productivity?
Honestly, I detested it and fought back with questions like, “Why don’t you pressure the HR manager? It’s also her responsibility as well!”
Deep down, only I alone will know the answer to my own question.
You’d wanted me to look beyond myself and grow.
You must've known that by the time I left Clinique, I had succeeded in controlling the turnover and the Brand was experiencing a double digit growth. It matters a lot to me at that time.
Some of the best friends I have now are my own staff, because you’ve inspired me to take it deeply from within and to serve them with the heart.
When I started with Sue, I didn’t leave those principles behind, I actually carried them along with me, much to the chagrin of my boss then.
Although he seemed to be a nice young chap, our working styles were completely different.
I could always feel negative energies from him. I don’t know. I just felt it and it was suffocating my soul.
I endured for 5 years and left.
I left with no regrets because I badly needed time to heal myself.
I need to learn how to let go….
I took a break and spent the last one and a half years, semi-working, reflecting and taking time to seek, to observe, to learn, to serve, to run and to dream a bit more than before. Basically, I need to realign myself back with nature.
Bits and pieces of my interesting encounters are shared in this blog.
Unlike some of my peers, I haven’t made much progress career wise, but I’m not worried. At some point in life, one needs to slow down and take stock of what we have in order to appreciate more.
It was good for me to look at the various aspects of life and learn.
Still learning…
I knew for sure what I wanted to do. I want to work in Hospis! Don’t ask me why. My heart just felt it.
The saying, ask and it shall be given….
Not so in my case, I asked but was rejected several times. I felt upset and discouraged.
Perhaps, it wasn’t meant for me after all.
Therefore, I’m now back to the retail industry which fortunately, I still do have some values. Haha! Friends commented that it is all fated because retail operation remains my forte – I can’t run away from it.
But then, retail no longer excites or drives me like it used to before.
Although the rewards are good but it is not the same as doing something after my own heart. Get the drift?
Guess what? I’m currently engaged with the Bonita Group Of Companies, reporting directly to the MD. He’s very kind man.
In some ways, he reminds me of you. I’m not joking!
Good business acumen, compassionate and down to earth.
But there’s one thing he is of no match to you; his attention to details. I guess you’ve set such high standards that made it so difficult for me to compare anyone with you. Perhaps, that’s the reason why I appear in his space.
Well, Robert. I don’t think I have the guts to tell you all these if you’re still my MD. But now, I’m writing it all down for you.
If you’re still around, I’ll be presenting to you my retail sales plan and we will be discusing about sales vs. target.
Funny, how we tend to talk more privately to people only when they are gone.
Sad, but I supposed life is like that.
Robert, do you remember how we panicked and got all stressed up over that Jeanette Wagner, Fred Langhammer and Leonard Lauder’s visits? Eeee…I certainly wouldn’t want to go through those nightmares again!
And I will also never forget the day when Steph and I were dragged to your office over an ad that we placed in The Star. We were forced to look at our own mistakes and when we couldn’t find it, you pointed out the flaws and taught us about attention to details all over again.
Your eye for details – no one in the company can escape from you!
Well, 6 years and many things have changed.
John and I had run a few more marathons.
Your daughters are all beautifully grown up. I’ve seen them every now and then in Annie’s facebook.
I met Mr. Loo briefly about 3 months ago and he is running Suria Meriang smoothly albeit the normal challenges.
Sue and Madam have both expanded their businesses and doing well.
The politics in this country are growing from bad to worse but you don’t need to know.
We’ve many more malls now and the cosmetics brands have increased 20 to 30 fold!
So are the competitions! It’s certainly not an easy market.
I believe as I mature my priorities change too. The things that are important to me right now are no longer the status, power or winning competitions.
It’s about living a life with love and humour. Love to understand and humour to endure.
It’s about learning to help the less fortunate.
It’s about leading with good intent of the heart.
This brought me back to some of the lessons which have been inspired by you.
You’ve taught me …
- The vision given and aims to aspire
- The pride of doing things well
- The attention to details
- The opportunities of responsibilities
- The power of perseverance
- To respect in order to gain respect
- To practice what we preach
- To deliver what we promise
Different phase in life, we do different things. And soon, I will be taking another leap of faith again.
By the time, I end this letter I already had a job offer from Hospis Malaysia and they are willing to wait for me to finish off my contract with Bonita until next year.
It is for me after all!!
Some people thought I am a bit ridiculous to opt out the security of a lucrative job and be surrounded by people who are terminally ill (directly or indirectly).
But I believe I will find meaning in my role in the palliative care services and the rewards will be much more than the salary package from both Clinique and Bonita put together.
I believe I'll be a better person too because I want to be a better person.
Miss you much...
Monday, September 27, 2010
A worthy comeback
9 months ago I was lamenting over the physical pain of my back that had gone crooked! 9 months ago I was coping with the psychic pain of not being able to run. Although I know I should give my body a chance to rest and shouldn't rush its healing process, it was tough.
After all the time, energy and miles invested to get into an optimum fitness level, it was difficult to just give up an activity which has been a large part of me for so many years. Then there is always the fear of losing my stamina and my sanity as quickly as I stop running. Therefore, in between times, I walked so that I don't fall into that lazy mode.
For an active person like me, my patience had surely been tried and tested...argh!! However, after 8 months of rest, it is equally important to know how to come back slowly. When I started, I trained with care...taking it slowly on flat roads, avoiding hills and ran the Hatyai Nature Run in August. I started participating in local races just about 2 weeks ago; the Chin Woo 5km Walk and Newton 25km Run where I ran the 12km distance.
As I wasn't quite ready for both events, I adjusted my expectations and took it easy in order not to get frustrated. I didn't get frustrated - instead, I was elated with my feat. I emerged Champion in both the said events, much to the surprise of many and my own!
Perhaps I was just lucky but my results were not bad at all. I managed 30mins for the 5km Walk and 68mins for Newton 12km Run where there were at least 3 to 4 hills to tackle. To be able to taste victory once more when I least expected it, feel just too good to be true.
Now I think the time taken off to rest has given me an opportunity to get to know my body and get it a chance to rest and heal. Perhaps, my body is also thanking me too.
The lesson? Rest is actually good for me. Yup, these 2 trophies had proven to me that the body has the capability to bounce back to form, if I allow her the rest she deserves. It will also serve as a reminder for me to race wisely from now on.
After all the time, energy and miles invested to get into an optimum fitness level, it was difficult to just give up an activity which has been a large part of me for so many years. Then there is always the fear of losing my stamina and my sanity as quickly as I stop running. Therefore, in between times, I walked so that I don't fall into that lazy mode.
For an active person like me, my patience had surely been tried and tested...argh!! However, after 8 months of rest, it is equally important to know how to come back slowly. When I started, I trained with care...taking it slowly on flat roads, avoiding hills and ran the Hatyai Nature Run in August. I started participating in local races just about 2 weeks ago; the Chin Woo 5km Walk and Newton 25km Run where I ran the 12km distance.
As I wasn't quite ready for both events, I adjusted my expectations and took it easy in order not to get frustrated. I didn't get frustrated - instead, I was elated with my feat. I emerged Champion in both the said events, much to the surprise of many and my own!
Perhaps I was just lucky but my results were not bad at all. I managed 30mins for the 5km Walk and 68mins for Newton 12km Run where there were at least 3 to 4 hills to tackle. To be able to taste victory once more when I least expected it, feel just too good to be true.
Now I think the time taken off to rest has given me an opportunity to get to know my body and get it a chance to rest and heal. Perhaps, my body is also thanking me too.
The lesson? Rest is actually good for me. Yup, these 2 trophies had proven to me that the body has the capability to bounce back to form, if I allow her the rest she deserves. It will also serve as a reminder for me to race wisely from now on.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Going to the temple?
"Go not to the temple to put flowers upon the feet of God. First fill your own house with the Fragrance of Love...
Go not to the temple to light candles before the altar of God. First remove the darkness of sin from your heart...
Go not to the temple to bow down your head in prayer. First learn to bow in humility before your fellowmen...
Go not to the temple to pray on bended knees. First bend down to lift someone who is down-trodden...
Go not to the temple to ask for forgiveness for your sins. First forgive from your heart those who have sinned against you."
By Rabindranath Tagore
Go not to the temple to light candles before the altar of God. First remove the darkness of sin from your heart...
Go not to the temple to bow down your head in prayer. First learn to bow in humility before your fellowmen...
Go not to the temple to pray on bended knees. First bend down to lift someone who is down-trodden...
Go not to the temple to ask for forgiveness for your sins. First forgive from your heart those who have sinned against you."
By Rabindranath Tagore
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
In memory of Ngae
After 2 weeks of gloom and doom, I'll like to think of brighter days ahead.
Last Sunday, Wan Yew Leong our former president of the Pacesetters Athletics Club initiated an impromptu memorial run for Ngae followed by breakfast. The turn-out was overwhelming. Wan commented that it was as good as a 30km practise run that he executed some years back. No doubt about that. Many came wearing their sarongs for the very first time (yours truly included) to run and some even ran barefooted (Ngae's trademark). Not that easy but we did it in memory of this man, our fellow runner and friend. I'm sure Ngae will be happy to know that so many of his friends from all over turned up to honour and remember him this way.
At 6am, the Bukit Aman carpark was already filled up with cars and runners were seen busy putting up our bibs 'In Memory Of Ngae Koh Hieng'. At 6.30am sharp, the event began with a short speech by Wan Yew Leong and a touching message from Ngae's wife delivered by Juliana Ali (Ngae's team-mate during the Langkawi Ironman 2009). We then observed a minute of silence after which, everyone was free to run their own distance.
I chose to walk with Lyn, Jenny Lee, Jenny Lim, Wern Jun, Siew Yin, Kien Ho and for the first time, Sofian's wife Tip joined us. She doesn't come out often and that Sunday, she came because of Ngae. We were unusually quiet in the begining. Perhaps, each of us, has our way of reminiscing our friendship with Ngae. Later Lok Chan Chuen caught up with us and broke the ice.
As we chatted, we realized that most of us shared similar feelings we had for Ngae. Feelings of deep regrets, of shame and of guilt. If only one of us cared enough to visit him...if only someone sensed it coming...if only we bothered...if only we knew.
This is life, very often things happened and we are left with...if only.
On that fateful Saturday, while John and I together with a group of volunteers from Pacesetters were busy distributing the New Balance 15km bibs to runners...
while we were packing goody bags and preparing some other stuffs...
while others were having tea and joking or perhaps, some went on a shopping spree..
There was a man, our friend facing his darkest hour. He was not an ordinary man we know - he had run 100km to raise fund for a kidney patient. He survived a 7 day challenge of the Marathon Des Sable running 243km across the Sahara. He conquered 3 Ironmans, did numerous Triathlons and ran countless marathons (barefooted and in his sarong)! He was an ultra runner extraordinaire.
But that evening he was hit by the pangs of loneliness...in solitude, depressed and confused. Something seemed so wrong! He was just waiting for the right time, the right place and the right moment to act. I wondered what was running through his mind at that moment?
Has he ever thought about the further suffering a fall from a height would cause his family and friends?
Has he ever wondered when his body would be found and shocking news his loved ones would receive?
Has he ever thought about life after death?
No, he was lost in his own world.
Many still struggled to get over this for awhile but the reality is, we had lost a friend.
We will live remembering Ngae as he was. Kind, humble, determined, loud, witty, bold, amiable and full of enthusiasm.
That Sunday morning it took Ngae's demise to bond us and to remind us again the important things in life. It also made us ponder our mortality.
As I reflect, I believe I need to do some soul searching and take a deeper look within myself.
"Life is divided into 3 terms - that which was, which is, and which will be. Let us learn from the past to profit by the present, and from the present to live better in the future." - William Wordsworth
Last Sunday, Wan Yew Leong our former president of the Pacesetters Athletics Club initiated an impromptu memorial run for Ngae followed by breakfast. The turn-out was overwhelming. Wan commented that it was as good as a 30km practise run that he executed some years back. No doubt about that. Many came wearing their sarongs for the very first time (yours truly included) to run and some even ran barefooted (Ngae's trademark). Not that easy but we did it in memory of this man, our fellow runner and friend. I'm sure Ngae will be happy to know that so many of his friends from all over turned up to honour and remember him this way.
At 6am, the Bukit Aman carpark was already filled up with cars and runners were seen busy putting up our bibs 'In Memory Of Ngae Koh Hieng'. At 6.30am sharp, the event began with a short speech by Wan Yew Leong and a touching message from Ngae's wife delivered by Juliana Ali (Ngae's team-mate during the Langkawi Ironman 2009). We then observed a minute of silence after which, everyone was free to run their own distance.
I chose to walk with Lyn, Jenny Lee, Jenny Lim, Wern Jun, Siew Yin, Kien Ho and for the first time, Sofian's wife Tip joined us. She doesn't come out often and that Sunday, she came because of Ngae. We were unusually quiet in the begining. Perhaps, each of us, has our way of reminiscing our friendship with Ngae. Later Lok Chan Chuen caught up with us and broke the ice.
As we chatted, we realized that most of us shared similar feelings we had for Ngae. Feelings of deep regrets, of shame and of guilt. If only one of us cared enough to visit him...if only someone sensed it coming...if only we bothered...if only we knew.
This is life, very often things happened and we are left with...if only.
On that fateful Saturday, while John and I together with a group of volunteers from Pacesetters were busy distributing the New Balance 15km bibs to runners...
while we were packing goody bags and preparing some other stuffs...
while others were having tea and joking or perhaps, some went on a shopping spree..
There was a man, our friend facing his darkest hour. He was not an ordinary man we know - he had run 100km to raise fund for a kidney patient. He survived a 7 day challenge of the Marathon Des Sable running 243km across the Sahara. He conquered 3 Ironmans, did numerous Triathlons and ran countless marathons (barefooted and in his sarong)! He was an ultra runner extraordinaire.
But that evening he was hit by the pangs of loneliness...in solitude, depressed and confused. Something seemed so wrong! He was just waiting for the right time, the right place and the right moment to act. I wondered what was running through his mind at that moment?
Has he ever thought about the further suffering a fall from a height would cause his family and friends?
Has he ever wondered when his body would be found and shocking news his loved ones would receive?
Has he ever thought about life after death?
No, he was lost in his own world.
Many still struggled to get over this for awhile but the reality is, we had lost a friend.
We will live remembering Ngae as he was. Kind, humble, determined, loud, witty, bold, amiable and full of enthusiasm.
That Sunday morning it took Ngae's demise to bond us and to remind us again the important things in life. It also made us ponder our mortality.
As I reflect, I believe I need to do some soul searching and take a deeper look within myself.
"Life is divided into 3 terms - that which was, which is, and which will be. Let us learn from the past to profit by the present, and from the present to live better in the future." - William Wordsworth
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Two sides of a coin.
As I write this, I feel truly blessed.
And I've got to sincerely thank my husband John and my sister June for it. I thank God for them. Because of them, I was given a whole year to rest and to do what I've wanted to do. Because of them, I was able to free myself from the stress of the working world and live a life.
John and June are the only ones who understood why I needed the 'break' while the rest of the world just watched and assumed, "Ah, that woman has already made her bucks! That's why she can afford not to work!"
The truth is I am not loaded at all. I don't purchase branded goods, drive a luxury car or dine in expensive restaurants. As a matter of fact, those who made that assumption are far more loaded than me.
The saying, "If you fall from grace, you'll know who your friends are" is very true. I don't think it's a disgrace when one stop working.
But I did encounter an unpleasant experience where I bumped into an old staff who completely ignored me when we met. I heard she got promoted recently. A few years back, I would get upset over a situation like this but not anymore now. People like this do not bother me anymore...the rythmn of life goes on no matter how well or how badly we went through our own. Along the way, I've also met new friends whose lives inspired and shamed me. I've learnt great lessons from them.
Ah, fortunately there are always two sides of a coin.
It is touching to have friends who face so much themselves and yet always put time aside to care.
Then there is a teacher, now a busy CEO who remembers me in her prayers and never failed to invite me over for Christmases and birthdays.
A fellow volunteer whom I just got to know but cares to text me when I was ill and down.
A young boy with learning disability sends his love every now and then even when I do not ask for it.
A few good friends who never forget to have dinner with me on my birthday year after year.
An old nanny who always welcome me to her home anytime I urged for some good home-cooked meals.
A group of running buddies who share not only my running passion but also ready to offer advice and concern when needed. Thus making my Sunday morning run more meaningful.
A husband whose shoulders I know I always can lean on anytime.
What more can I ask? With them, it is so easy to be grateful in the midst of trying to be useful. With them, it is not difficult to remember what is good. And to them, I want to say a Big Thank You from the very bottom of my heart.
The knowledge of life that I gained from the past one year were enormous and the rewards are boundless. At least I feel a better person from it.
So now, after a year it's time to get back to work again - tomorrow. It will not be easy and I had mixed feelings, but I will go with an open heart, a clear mind and some faith in myself.
"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." - John F Kennedy
And I've got to sincerely thank my husband John and my sister June for it. I thank God for them. Because of them, I was given a whole year to rest and to do what I've wanted to do. Because of them, I was able to free myself from the stress of the working world and live a life.
John and June are the only ones who understood why I needed the 'break' while the rest of the world just watched and assumed, "Ah, that woman has already made her bucks! That's why she can afford not to work!"
The truth is I am not loaded at all. I don't purchase branded goods, drive a luxury car or dine in expensive restaurants. As a matter of fact, those who made that assumption are far more loaded than me.
The saying, "If you fall from grace, you'll know who your friends are" is very true. I don't think it's a disgrace when one stop working.
But I did encounter an unpleasant experience where I bumped into an old staff who completely ignored me when we met. I heard she got promoted recently. A few years back, I would get upset over a situation like this but not anymore now. People like this do not bother me anymore...the rythmn of life goes on no matter how well or how badly we went through our own. Along the way, I've also met new friends whose lives inspired and shamed me. I've learnt great lessons from them.
Ah, fortunately there are always two sides of a coin.
It is touching to have friends who face so much themselves and yet always put time aside to care.
Then there is a teacher, now a busy CEO who remembers me in her prayers and never failed to invite me over for Christmases and birthdays.
A fellow volunteer whom I just got to know but cares to text me when I was ill and down.
A young boy with learning disability sends his love every now and then even when I do not ask for it.
A few good friends who never forget to have dinner with me on my birthday year after year.
An old nanny who always welcome me to her home anytime I urged for some good home-cooked meals.
A group of running buddies who share not only my running passion but also ready to offer advice and concern when needed. Thus making my Sunday morning run more meaningful.
A husband whose shoulders I know I always can lean on anytime.
What more can I ask? With them, it is so easy to be grateful in the midst of trying to be useful. With them, it is not difficult to remember what is good. And to them, I want to say a Big Thank You from the very bottom of my heart.
The knowledge of life that I gained from the past one year were enormous and the rewards are boundless. At least I feel a better person from it.
So now, after a year it's time to get back to work again - tomorrow. It will not be easy and I had mixed feelings, but I will go with an open heart, a clear mind and some faith in myself.
"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." - John F Kennedy
Friday, March 5, 2010
The -
There are poems which I can read over and over again and not get tired of reciting it. This is one that I like very much. It defines the dash between our birth dates and our "expiry dates". The dash is our life, our legacy. And our decisions define our legacies and the lives we touch. It also serves as a good reminder for us to live our life. I'll just share it here...
THE DASH by Linda Ellis
I read of a man who stood to speak
at the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
from the beginning...to the end.
He noted that first came the date of her birth
and spoke of the following date with tears,
but we said that mattered most of all
was the dash between those years.
For that dash represents all the time
that she spent alive on earth...
and how only those who loved her
know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own;
the cars...the house...the cash.
What matters is how we live and love
and how we spend our dash.
So think about this long and hard...
are there things you'd like to change?
For you never know how much time is left.
(You could be at "dash midrange").
If we could just slow down enough
to reconsider what's true and real,
and always try to understand
the way other people feel.
And be less quick to anger,
and show more appreciation more
and love the people in our lives
like we've never loved them before.
If we treat each other with respect,
and more often wear a smile...
remembering that this special dash
might only last a little while.
So, when your eulogy's being read
with your life's action to rehash...
would you be proud of the things they
say about how you spend your dash?
THE DASH by Linda Ellis
I read of a man who stood to speak
at the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
from the beginning...to the end.
He noted that first came the date of her birth
and spoke of the following date with tears,
but we said that mattered most of all
was the dash between those years.
For that dash represents all the time
that she spent alive on earth...
and how only those who loved her
know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own;
the cars...the house...the cash.
What matters is how we live and love
and how we spend our dash.
So think about this long and hard...
are there things you'd like to change?
For you never know how much time is left.
(You could be at "dash midrange").
If we could just slow down enough
to reconsider what's true and real,
and always try to understand
the way other people feel.
And be less quick to anger,
and show more appreciation more
and love the people in our lives
like we've never loved them before.
If we treat each other with respect,
and more often wear a smile...
remembering that this special dash
might only last a little while.
So, when your eulogy's being read
with your life's action to rehash...
would you be proud of the things they
say about how you spend your dash?
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Reflections of the year
Besides Christmas, New Year is my favourite occassion of the year. It'd better be.
Although I do have some mixed feelings about the coming year, the prospect of starting over brings hope that things will get better. As usual, no resolutions from me but a chance to pursue dreams, begin new journeys and bid goodbye to the negative things of the previous year. It is also a time to count my blessings and be thankful for every little thing that I'm are blessed with.
Life is one big adventure and the choices we have are abundant but not without endless forks on the roads too. When I made the decision to take a break from work this year, I thought my world will come to a standstill for me but oh no, I was wrong. I have learnt some of life's important lessons that I never imagine I would've experienced at work.
Caught in the rut of everyday life, I was so consumed with worry and anxiety, that I have forgotten about my true nature. In April, I left earthly comforts aside and together with some friends, we joined The Pilgrimage Walk from Batu Caves to Maran covering 204km for 3 days. The journey was an eye-opener.
The Lesson : I should try to shift my values more towards people and relationship and less towards accumulating things. There are many things in life I don't really need. I've become more aware of what I take with me and what I don't.
Then I had another mind blowing experience at the Silent Retreat at Lucky Valley with breathworks and this time, witnessed a past life regression from Kim who travelled with me there.
The Lesson I learnt did not come from Breathworks or a past life regression. It came from the phrase 'LISTEN TO YOUR HEART'. But at times, I asked myself again and again "how do I know if the 'leading' is right?" Many times, I've got to learn it the hard way.
And there at the Hospis Daycare where I served as a volunteer, I met a group of new friends. I learned from patients and fellow volunteers the new meaning of life. Cancer patients who continue to battle so tirelessly in order to light up the lives of others and serving as an inspiration to always celebrate life - no matter how tough the going gets, humbled me.
I attended my first workshop with Hospis Malaysia on Palliative Care in August where love and compassion was once again emphasized to me. I learned the signifance of talking less and listening more, as Epictetus so aptly puts it, " Nature gave us one tongue and two ears so we could hear twice as much as we speak".
As for running, this year I ran two full marathons in KL and Pattaya. A few more half marathons but the ones I enjoyed most must be The Ocean to Ocean Relay Run in Thailand, JW Cameron Run, Penang Bridge Run and Powerman at Lumut (where I went just to support John and my other friends). And closing the year with a little boost for me was the recent Putrajaya 12hr Walk.
There we go...as we enter into a brand new decade, may we continue to count our blessings, big or small.
"It is good to have money and things that money can buy, but it's good too, to check up once in a while and make sure you haven't lost the things money can't buy." - George Lorimer
Although I do have some mixed feelings about the coming year, the prospect of starting over brings hope that things will get better. As usual, no resolutions from me but a chance to pursue dreams, begin new journeys and bid goodbye to the negative things of the previous year. It is also a time to count my blessings and be thankful for every little thing that I'm are blessed with.
Life is one big adventure and the choices we have are abundant but not without endless forks on the roads too. When I made the decision to take a break from work this year, I thought my world will come to a standstill for me but oh no, I was wrong. I have learnt some of life's important lessons that I never imagine I would've experienced at work.
Caught in the rut of everyday life, I was so consumed with worry and anxiety, that I have forgotten about my true nature. In April, I left earthly comforts aside and together with some friends, we joined The Pilgrimage Walk from Batu Caves to Maran covering 204km for 3 days. The journey was an eye-opener.
The Lesson : I should try to shift my values more towards people and relationship and less towards accumulating things. There are many things in life I don't really need. I've become more aware of what I take with me and what I don't.
Then I had another mind blowing experience at the Silent Retreat at Lucky Valley with breathworks and this time, witnessed a past life regression from Kim who travelled with me there.
The Lesson I learnt did not come from Breathworks or a past life regression. It came from the phrase 'LISTEN TO YOUR HEART'. But at times, I asked myself again and again "how do I know if the 'leading' is right?" Many times, I've got to learn it the hard way.
And there at the Hospis Daycare where I served as a volunteer, I met a group of new friends. I learned from patients and fellow volunteers the new meaning of life. Cancer patients who continue to battle so tirelessly in order to light up the lives of others and serving as an inspiration to always celebrate life - no matter how tough the going gets, humbled me.
I attended my first workshop with Hospis Malaysia on Palliative Care in August where love and compassion was once again emphasized to me. I learned the signifance of talking less and listening more, as Epictetus so aptly puts it, " Nature gave us one tongue and two ears so we could hear twice as much as we speak".
As for running, this year I ran two full marathons in KL and Pattaya. A few more half marathons but the ones I enjoyed most must be The Ocean to Ocean Relay Run in Thailand, JW Cameron Run, Penang Bridge Run and Powerman at Lumut (where I went just to support John and my other friends). And closing the year with a little boost for me was the recent Putrajaya 12hr Walk.
There we go...as we enter into a brand new decade, may we continue to count our blessings, big or small.
"It is good to have money and things that money can buy, but it's good too, to check up once in a while and make sure you haven't lost the things money can't buy." - George Lorimer
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Almost there!
This is my 3rd 12-hour walk competition but my first experience walking in Putrajaya. The previous two races were held in Penang where I completed 76km in 2002 and 80km in 2007. This time, my goal was to better those records. Therefore I decided to go for an ultra-marathon distance which is 84km.
A 12-hour walk works exactly just like the tortoise-and-hare race. It rewards the patient and penalizes the overeager. It takes a lot of perseverance and patience and certainly not a sport for sprinters. Each race (be it a 12-hour or a 24-hour walk) has taught me some valuable lessons over the years. I’ve learned discipline, modesty and self-control amongst other things through such an endurance game.
Putrajaya : December 13th. 2009
On arrival at Putrajaya, I could feel much excitement in the air when I saw the many tents being set up. Some non-competitors were there simply to have fun and decided to camp at the site while giving moral support to their families or friends. I was greeted with so many familiar faces including my friendly competitors from Hong Kong and France. It was also like a mini reunion when I met old friends like Shew Keng, Nan Yang and I was surprised to see Wai Keen (one of Julie’s student from the Supported Living Programme) present there. When I asked if he remembers me, he was quick to respond, “Yes. Yap Wai Mun!” He was there to support Julie and to prove that people with learning disability do have the abilities beyond their reckonings, given the chance. He succeeded by completing 28km which is indeed quite a feat.
Like Wai Keen, I believe there were many who came with their own personal objectives. Some were determined to better their previous record – some were just curious to find how walking for 12 hours feel like, and where it would take them – some came to walk with their family or spouse, merely to bond. Of course, some were there to win the prize money! Whatever it is, the fact that they have the courage to take on this challenge made them all winners with their own rights.
At about 7.45pm, more than 700 walkers gathered at the starting line. After a short briefing which no one paid much attention to, the race began….everyone was rushing and moving very fast especially the Kenyans. This is nothing unusual particularly in the early hours when everyone is still fresh and lively. I reminded myself to control my pace, preventing myself from walking too quickly or ‘over-performing’.
4th hour: 8pm – 12am
Although I found the right rhythm and started walking at a decent pace, I felt uncomfortable. I was battling with my inner self as I wasn’t sure if I had it right. But then, why should I feel this way? After all, this game is a personal one, ultimately there’s only one walker who really counts – ME. Then, I remembered I had John. My heart was filled with deep gratitude for John who sacrificed sleep to be there for me, as my manager and supporter. Well, let’s face it: how many husbands would do that for their wives? I look around and count myself so blessed and fortunate. While many spouses consider their ‘other half’ extremely insane to indulge themselves into such a crazy activity, John was at the race course throughout, monitoring my progress, checking results, attending to my every need and was never short of words of encouragement to cheer me up. The results revealed at 12am showed that I was ranked 6th position and had covered 27km after walking for 4 hours.
8th hour: 12am – 4am
After twelve, the atmosphere became somewhat quiet; the number of walkers was reduced as some had decided to retire or catch their 40 winks at their respective tents. Some walkers went to reunite with friends and refresh themselves while others were just resting their poor tired feet. With a goal in mind, I was relunctant to take any breaks. I was still concentrating to be as consistent as possible and entertained myself with a little old chorus in my heart: “Give me oil in my lamp, keep me burning. Give me oil in my lamp, I pray. Give me oil in my lamp, keep me burning. Keep me burning till the break of day!” But it was still too far away from day break…
Due to an early dinner, the pangs of hunger hit me at around 1am and I made a request to John for some light snacks. I am normally not fussy with food but this time, I’ve got to admit that the food was lousy. However, I managed to grab half a hard-boiled egg and half a banana to last me until the end of the race. I was disappointed there wasn't any coffee when it was just about the only thing we needed most to help us stay awake! I took a sip of barley drink which tasted nothing but sugar water - yuks! Kilometers after kilometers I walked, almost imperceptibly at first and then finally passing Kenyan IrineJeptoo and my Malaysian compatriot Norazilah, both of whom I guessed were beginning to concede to the indiscretion of their earlier pace. I was thankful to friends eg. Adnan, Pheik Hoon, Teresa, Terence, Alex and Christina who kept my spirit alive by cheering and encouraging me each time I passed them. Later, Billie Kwok from Hong Kong (last year’s women champion) walked pass me and told me that she’ll be stopping at 50km and not continue anymore as she was tired. She was already at 2nd placing then. However, she encouraged me to keep moving. This is truly the spirit of sportsmanship and I embraced it!
By then, I was aware that the shock of each step radiating from my knees up to my hips and the strain slowing creeping from my spine, penetrating into my every nerve and sinew. Every kilometer took a little away not only from my legs and muscles but everywhere else. In spite of that, I was glad to be able to maintain an air of sangfroid. I motivated myself by drawing inspiration from whatever positive quotes that I could recall. “Every step you walk will get you closer to the finishing line.” “If you can’t run, then walk. If you can’t walk, then crawl. Do what you have to do. Just keep moving forward and never, never give up.” – Dean Karnazes.
It is certainly not easy, trying to overcome pain and exhaustion with clarity, alertness and stoicism when your brain kept telling you it’s time to sleep. Perhaps, this is what this game is all about. It aims to highlight to us the value of trying, enduring, persisting and fighting life’s hardship and that we can be victorious when physical and spiritual resources are mobilized. Sad but true that agony is part of this game. Yet it always humbled me to think that during a race like this, all of us are in this together regardless of age, gender, race, religion or nationality. We all struggled and suffered the same pain. But as an individual accustomed to pushing my physical limits, I had learnt not to be overwhelmed by pain, but to overcome it. Therefore I made up my mind to push myself to the edge of my pain threshold until I felt it no more.
12th hour: 4am – 8am
No results were being produced for the past 6 hours. I didn’t know why. There were some technical confusion or so it seemed. I had no idea where I stand and lost count the distance I had walked. Anyway, John advised me to just keep moving and I adhered to it.
By now, the pace I had been going at for the last couple of hours was entrenched in my legs until they now felt the need to maintain at that pace. After all, it still hurts just as bad no matter what speed I chose to go, so I might as well walk fast if I could.
Francis Hobert, Sports Physiotherapist for Kora Bouffilert from France instilled some confidence in me when he gave me a thumbs-up and a smile. I returned that smile to discover how powerful it has turned out to be. Suddenly all the tension seemed to ebb out of my aching body; every cell in my entire being were awaken!! Now with another 3 hours to go, I decided to increase my pace slightly.
When the results were finally released at 6am, John had already gone for his morning run around the vicinity of Putrajaya. I continued walking and was pleased that my legs were co-operative. When I saw some participants limping and afflicted with blisters, I thanked my own two feet for carrying me this far. Then Wendy Soo signaled to me with the latest results that I was at second placing. But it was Mohd Hanizam (the 4th 24-hour walk champion) who fed me with the details, he said, “At 10th hour, you are ranked 2nd having walked 70km with Isaac So from Hong Kong behind you covering 68km.” He advised me to maintain at that pace.
Final countdown : 7am – 8am
Finally, the daybreak and I felt lifted and refreshed...it was so good to be the first to watch the sunrise while the rest of the world slept. Having walked for 11 hours and realizing that I still have enough energy stored in my body to finish strong has to be one of the greatest feelings at that time. The ultra-marathon distance seemed achievable and I tried to do my own calculation to walk another 14km within the two hours that was left. Alas, I had forgotten what a failure I was when it comes to mathematics!! At 8am after walking diligently for 12 hours, I finally arrived at 83km; 1km short of my target of 84km. The ultra-marathon distance seemed so near yet so far.
Final results
1. KORA BOUFFILERT (FRANCE) : 94KM
2. YAP WAI MUN (MALAYSIA) : 83KM
3. ISSAC SO (HONG KONG) : 81KM
4. NORAZILAH (MALAYSIA) : 79KM
5. IRINE JEPTOO (KENYA) : 76KM
I believe that in every race there is a defining moment for everyone. Some tend to think of that moment as being the first to cross the finishing line, for some it is to achieve a personal best, while many others find it absolutely satisfying just to complete the entire journey. My defining moment at the end of the 12 hours still remains a very personal experience for me. With age catching up, I found renewed strength both mentally and physically. And I also found comfort in knowing that I had fought well.
“The important thing in the race is not winning but taking part. The essential thing in life is not conquering but fighting well.” – Pierre de Coubertin
Monday, July 13, 2009
No strings attached...
I must say that the Seremban Half Marathon is the only running race in Malaysia where the medal is the exact same medal that was given out to runners ever since the race was first organized, like two decades ago!! And it is the only medal (in my collection of medals) with no string attached. Boring!!
John and I had actually ban this race from our running agenda for a few years because it was so poorly organized. This year, we decided to give it another chance after hearing about some changes and improvements being made in the route design etc. However, we didn't set any expectation, in fact John reminded me to prepare for the worst and treat it as another 'training' run. So it came as a pleasant surprise for us when we experienced the following improvements :
New Route Design
At least 60 percent of the running course have changed...taking runners to some residential area which I enjoyed most because it's traffic free. The race route is like a roller coaster - hills after hills, which is fine for me.
The other 40 percent of the running course is back to running with the traffic and there were parts where we still had to run side by side with a lorry or a car and inhaled nothing but carbon monoxide!!
Adequate water/isotonic stations and sponging stations
Those days there was only 1 miserable water station at 11km and along the road, hawkers were selling drinking water @ RM1. Today, we had 4 refreshment stations and still plenty of it after the finishing race.
Speedy prize money collection
There is no need to wait for speeches after speeches. There is no need to wait for anouncements. There is no need to line up (like stupid FTAAA always made winners do so) to the podium. We went straight to an officer in charge of our category, present our ID and running bib for checking and that was it. Fast...no time wasted at all...I like this very much.
Fuss-free lucky draw
Yes, I've got coupon which said that I won a mystery gift. With that, I went to the Lucky Draw booth and draw my prize. The prize was half a dozen cans of 100 Plus and a Hotlink pack. Normally, a lot of time were wasted in getting a VIP to draw the lucky number and then waiting for the numbers to be called (not once but several times over), then waiting for the lucky person to check his/her number and then waiting for the person to slowly move to collect his/her prize. And it can go on and on until thy kingdom come...
Overall it was pleasant morning for me. The weather was superb - cooling and breezy. I enjoyed running the rolling hills. I won some prize money and received a small lucky draw without wasting any time waiting. I had a good breakfast with John, Lok and Agnes and headed home, happy!
John and I had actually ban this race from our running agenda for a few years because it was so poorly organized. This year, we decided to give it another chance after hearing about some changes and improvements being made in the route design etc. However, we didn't set any expectation, in fact John reminded me to prepare for the worst and treat it as another 'training' run. So it came as a pleasant surprise for us when we experienced the following improvements :
New Route Design
At least 60 percent of the running course have changed...taking runners to some residential area which I enjoyed most because it's traffic free. The race route is like a roller coaster - hills after hills, which is fine for me.
The other 40 percent of the running course is back to running with the traffic and there were parts where we still had to run side by side with a lorry or a car and inhaled nothing but carbon monoxide!!
Adequate water/isotonic stations and sponging stations
Those days there was only 1 miserable water station at 11km and along the road, hawkers were selling drinking water @ RM1. Today, we had 4 refreshment stations and still plenty of it after the finishing race.
Speedy prize money collection
There is no need to wait for speeches after speeches. There is no need to wait for anouncements. There is no need to line up (like stupid FTAAA always made winners do so) to the podium. We went straight to an officer in charge of our category, present our ID and running bib for checking and that was it. Fast...no time wasted at all...I like this very much.
Fuss-free lucky draw
Yes, I've got coupon which said that I won a mystery gift. With that, I went to the Lucky Draw booth and draw my prize. The prize was half a dozen cans of 100 Plus and a Hotlink pack. Normally, a lot of time were wasted in getting a VIP to draw the lucky number and then waiting for the numbers to be called (not once but several times over), then waiting for the lucky person to check his/her number and then waiting for the person to slowly move to collect his/her prize. And it can go on and on until thy kingdom come...
Overall it was pleasant morning for me. The weather was superb - cooling and breezy. I enjoyed running the rolling hills. I won some prize money and received a small lucky draw without wasting any time waiting. I had a good breakfast with John, Lok and Agnes and headed home, happy!
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Story from spiritual-short-stories
A Hindu saint who was visiting the river Ganges to take a bath found a group of family members on the banks, shouting in anger at each other.
He turned to his disciples smiled and asked, "Why do people in anger shout to each other?"
Disciples thought for awhile, one of them said, "Because we lose our calm, we shout."
"But, why should you shout when the other person is just next to you? You can well tell him what you have to say in a soft manner." asked the saint.
Disciples gave some other answers but none were satisfactory.
Finally the saint explained,
"When two people are angry at each other, their heart distance alot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other to cover that great distance.
What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other but speak softly, because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is either non-existent or very small..."
The saint continued,
"When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they can get even closer to each other in their love. Finally, they don't even need to whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are, when they are in love."
He looked at his disciples and said, "So when you argue with your loved ones do not let your hearts get distant. Do not say words that distance each other more, or else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return. They may end up in divorce, for instance."
He turned to his disciples smiled and asked, "Why do people in anger shout to each other?"
Disciples thought for awhile, one of them said, "Because we lose our calm, we shout."
"But, why should you shout when the other person is just next to you? You can well tell him what you have to say in a soft manner." asked the saint.
Disciples gave some other answers but none were satisfactory.
Finally the saint explained,
"When two people are angry at each other, their heart distance alot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other to cover that great distance.
What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other but speak softly, because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is either non-existent or very small..."
The saint continued,
"When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they can get even closer to each other in their love. Finally, they don't even need to whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are, when they are in love."
He looked at his disciples and said, "So when you argue with your loved ones do not let your hearts get distant. Do not say words that distance each other more, or else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return. They may end up in divorce, for instance."
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Remembering Jennifer
Yesterday I managed to catch up with Shih Ming. She is one of my childhood friends who used to be my neighbour. We shared and stayed under the same roof : her family occupied the front portion, while we took the back portion as our humble abode. We also happened to go to the same school, except that she went to School One while my sisters and I were from School 2. And there was always a saga between the School One and School Two even though they were the same school! Until today I still don't understand why?! Shih Ming took Bas Sekolah to school and I took public transport or sometimes 'jalan kaki' (by foot).
There were moments of melancholy when we started lamenting the passing of my sister, Jennifer. It's been exactly 3 years yesterday and she still resides very much in our hearts. Shih Ming and I chatted and wonder if she misses us as much as we missed her. For me, I recalled the bittersweet days of yesteryears, when she was around doing what sisters did together : growing up, playing games, going to school, singing in church, fighting and making up and then fighting again, laughing loudly at some silly jokes, griefing over the loss of our father, went 'ga ga' over the late Leslie Cheung, forgiving when forgiveness is due, getting married, rejoicing over the arrival of my little nephew, family reunions etc.
Time to cherish and savour, and presently just to remember.
Whatever - One thing remains very clear that no matter how we fought, we never failed to give support or help each other when help is needed. All goes to prove that the foundation of love that we learnt in our school (BBGS) is so strong that it has stood us in good stead over the years. Unfortunately BBGS no longer exists but for anyone who has a part of it, they must count themselves very fortunate. For me, BBGS has been one incredible experience of life and love, a blessing.
We pondered over the question, "Where is Jennifer now? Is she in heaven? Where is heaven if there's one?
The passing of Jennifer has somewhat driven my desire to bring me closer to nature in an attempt to get me to open my heart.
In his book 'Talking to Heaven' James Van Praagh describes heaven as such :
"I personally believe that heaven is the other side of our physical world and is very much like our physical world with similar sights and sounds, although more vivid and more colorful. I believe there are many levels to heaven, and we go to that level we have created by our thoughts, words and deeds while on earth. Those of us who have grown to the same spiritual level will reside with one another in the same heaven. Beings who are more spiritually aware reside on a higher level, and less evolved souls are on a lower level. We can never go to a higher level until we earn it. However, those beings on a higher level can go to a lower sphere, and in many cases assist those souls who are not as aware. We go to the heaven that we have created based upon our words, thoughts and deeds while on earth."
I am not all that spiritual to discuss about heavenly matters or anything related. What's important is the passing of Jennifer and also some of my friends recently has taught me to value and appreciate life. Like Randy Pausch mentioned in his Last Lecture, " Time is all you have. And you may find one day that you have less than you think."
"Live your life each day as you would climb a mountain. An occassional glance toward the summit keeps the goal in mind, but many beautiful scenes are to be observed from each new vantage point. Climb slowly, steadily, enjoying each passing moment; and the view from the summit will serve as a fitting climax for the journey." - Harold B. Melchart
There were moments of melancholy when we started lamenting the passing of my sister, Jennifer. It's been exactly 3 years yesterday and she still resides very much in our hearts. Shih Ming and I chatted and wonder if she misses us as much as we missed her. For me, I recalled the bittersweet days of yesteryears, when she was around doing what sisters did together : growing up, playing games, going to school, singing in church, fighting and making up and then fighting again, laughing loudly at some silly jokes, griefing over the loss of our father, went 'ga ga' over the late Leslie Cheung, forgiving when forgiveness is due, getting married, rejoicing over the arrival of my little nephew, family reunions etc.
Time to cherish and savour, and presently just to remember.
Whatever - One thing remains very clear that no matter how we fought, we never failed to give support or help each other when help is needed. All goes to prove that the foundation of love that we learnt in our school (BBGS) is so strong that it has stood us in good stead over the years. Unfortunately BBGS no longer exists but for anyone who has a part of it, they must count themselves very fortunate. For me, BBGS has been one incredible experience of life and love, a blessing.
We pondered over the question, "Where is Jennifer now? Is she in heaven? Where is heaven if there's one?
The passing of Jennifer has somewhat driven my desire to bring me closer to nature in an attempt to get me to open my heart.
In his book 'Talking to Heaven' James Van Praagh describes heaven as such :
"I personally believe that heaven is the other side of our physical world and is very much like our physical world with similar sights and sounds, although more vivid and more colorful. I believe there are many levels to heaven, and we go to that level we have created by our thoughts, words and deeds while on earth. Those of us who have grown to the same spiritual level will reside with one another in the same heaven. Beings who are more spiritually aware reside on a higher level, and less evolved souls are on a lower level. We can never go to a higher level until we earn it. However, those beings on a higher level can go to a lower sphere, and in many cases assist those souls who are not as aware. We go to the heaven that we have created based upon our words, thoughts and deeds while on earth."
I am not all that spiritual to discuss about heavenly matters or anything related. What's important is the passing of Jennifer and also some of my friends recently has taught me to value and appreciate life. Like Randy Pausch mentioned in his Last Lecture, " Time is all you have. And you may find one day that you have less than you think."
"Live your life each day as you would climb a mountain. An occassional glance toward the summit keeps the goal in mind, but many beautiful scenes are to be observed from each new vantage point. Climb slowly, steadily, enjoying each passing moment; and the view from the summit will serve as a fitting climax for the journey." - Harold B. Melchart
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Introspection
January passed by so swiftly and quietly...it's been kinda boring month. Like some people, I'm feeling a little fragile and introspective.
Everything else remained the same except that it was a workday for everyone I know but me. Or so it seemed. Whatever it is - I stick to the basics and was pleased to have accomplished even just a few things.
Decluttering physically and mentally
In the spirit of economising and cutting back, I started thinking of things and people I don't need, especially the ones who clutter my life and don't bring any positive energy to me.
Last Christmas, I spent the whole afternoon clearing out all the clothes that John and I don't need and gave away to the Home for Spastic Children (a project by Tony). This Chinese New Year, I cleared my kitchen and discovered the huge amount of utensils that my mom bought and never use them! I called up the House Of Joy to check if they needed them and sent all the kitchen utensils and other stuffs to them.
Well, when it comes to people...it's much harder. Who do you want to keep and who should you let go? In the end I concluded that those who have nothing better than annoy the hell out of me have no right to have any place in my life. Fair? But perhaps, they appeared in my life to test my patience? To teach me lessons I need to learn? I don't know but people come into our lives for a reason and when their time is up, they go. If they are fated to remain longer, they stay.
Peter Walsh author of the book 'It's All Too Much' commented on the Oprah Winfrey Show that we should also learn to get rid of unhappy memories that clutter our mind and invite pleasant and positive thoughts to fill in. If we hold too long to unpleasant or 'toxic' memories, then it would be difficult for blessings to flow in us.
Spending less and wisely
Everyone is talking about the global economic crisis, the stock market's downward tumble and all the economic woes it brings.
Spending less means spending but wisely. Many times, I must confess I often find myself splashing out on unnecessary items and ended purchasing things that I don't really need or particularly want. Those stuff would normally sit in the cupboard for ages until the next de-clutter process or the next.
Sometimes it's just difficult to restrain our retail urges. Perhaps, when we're on a shopping spree, our brains are no longer our own...which resulted impulse spending. This often leave a sense of regret what retailers call "buyer's remorse".
For now and at least for the past few months, before making any purchase, I often ponder and ask myself, "Do I really need them? Will I be using them? For how long? And I do see some progress.
Running alone and freely
Everything on my running route seemed normal. I haven't participated in any race yet.
Recently, although I did not officially run the Great Eastern 30km Race - I followed the exact 30km course with other runners. I stayed right at the back for the pack and was rather pleased to complete that very challenging 30km within 3 hours.
Nowadays, I run briefly and alone most mornings and on weekends, I try longer distance with my running buddies. It's always good to have both kinds of running agenda, the solitary and the shared. Although sometimes, I'm sold on heading out alone. No schedules to shift, no chatter, no one to chase. And more doors left to open.
Running solo at times is not all that bad. Solitary run can slow things down, de-torque the body, mind and spirit, put the world on hold even if it's only for awhile, and return to the unhurried tempo of an earlier time. While running by myself, I don't have to care much about movements...I'm free to find whatever rhythm I want and the only words I hear will be those in my own head. I shun the modernday invasive chattering and simply notice what is left : myself.
Then, I was so happy that John and I finally managed to get tickets to watch the musical Mamma Mia. We had a blast!
Everything else remained the same except that it was a workday for everyone I know but me. Or so it seemed. Whatever it is - I stick to the basics and was pleased to have accomplished even just a few things.
Decluttering physically and mentally
In the spirit of economising and cutting back, I started thinking of things and people I don't need, especially the ones who clutter my life and don't bring any positive energy to me.
Last Christmas, I spent the whole afternoon clearing out all the clothes that John and I don't need and gave away to the Home for Spastic Children (a project by Tony). This Chinese New Year, I cleared my kitchen and discovered the huge amount of utensils that my mom bought and never use them! I called up the House Of Joy to check if they needed them and sent all the kitchen utensils and other stuffs to them.
Well, when it comes to people...it's much harder. Who do you want to keep and who should you let go? In the end I concluded that those who have nothing better than annoy the hell out of me have no right to have any place in my life. Fair? But perhaps, they appeared in my life to test my patience? To teach me lessons I need to learn? I don't know but people come into our lives for a reason and when their time is up, they go. If they are fated to remain longer, they stay.
Peter Walsh author of the book 'It's All Too Much' commented on the Oprah Winfrey Show that we should also learn to get rid of unhappy memories that clutter our mind and invite pleasant and positive thoughts to fill in. If we hold too long to unpleasant or 'toxic' memories, then it would be difficult for blessings to flow in us.
Spending less and wisely
Everyone is talking about the global economic crisis, the stock market's downward tumble and all the economic woes it brings.
Spending less means spending but wisely. Many times, I must confess I often find myself splashing out on unnecessary items and ended purchasing things that I don't really need or particularly want. Those stuff would normally sit in the cupboard for ages until the next de-clutter process or the next.
Sometimes it's just difficult to restrain our retail urges. Perhaps, when we're on a shopping spree, our brains are no longer our own...which resulted impulse spending. This often leave a sense of regret what retailers call "buyer's remorse".
For now and at least for the past few months, before making any purchase, I often ponder and ask myself, "Do I really need them? Will I be using them? For how long? And I do see some progress.
Running alone and freely
Everything on my running route seemed normal. I haven't participated in any race yet.
Recently, although I did not officially run the Great Eastern 30km Race - I followed the exact 30km course with other runners. I stayed right at the back for the pack and was rather pleased to complete that very challenging 30km within 3 hours.
Nowadays, I run briefly and alone most mornings and on weekends, I try longer distance with my running buddies. It's always good to have both kinds of running agenda, the solitary and the shared. Although sometimes, I'm sold on heading out alone. No schedules to shift, no chatter, no one to chase. And more doors left to open.
Running solo at times is not all that bad. Solitary run can slow things down, de-torque the body, mind and spirit, put the world on hold even if it's only for awhile, and return to the unhurried tempo of an earlier time. While running by myself, I don't have to care much about movements...I'm free to find whatever rhythm I want and the only words I hear will be those in my own head. I shun the modernday invasive chattering and simply notice what is left : myself.
Then, I was so happy that John and I finally managed to get tickets to watch the musical Mamma Mia. We had a blast!
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Another Year Has Dawned
2008 was a strange year and will definitely be remembered for its drama, troubles and strengths. In spite of it all, I have learned many lessons. This year of sorts has taught me about the difference between needs and wants and about connection between the economy and the environment. Therefore now, it is so important for me to take into account of what really matters...to appreciate what I already have, to count my blessings, to be grateful for the simple things in life and to be mindful of people around me - the less fortunate, the homeless and especially children living in anguish and fear.
Today, especially today as we greet the dawn of a brand new year I wish to share this meaningful poem (posted by my friend Julie) here :
Another Day Has Dawned by Kit Callum
Amidst our chaos and confusion
Amidst our anguish and despair
Amidst our ever-ending questions and blame
…Lies a world of lessons.
Through our tears and astonishment
Through our hopelessness and desperations
Through our anxiety and grief
…Lies a world of shame.
For it is our world that is responsible
It is our world that allowed this sadness
It is our world that has lost its youth
…And it is our world that needs to change.
It is a warning for those who would isolate it
It is a warning for those who would bury it
It is a warning for those who think it will not touch them
…It is we, who need to address it.
For this is the birth of our own generation
This is the birth of our own problems
This is the birth of our own mistakes
…It is we, who needed to watch over them.
A new generation who have hopes and dreams
A new generation who have life and laughter
A new generation who deserve a chance at peace
…It is we who need to make them secure.
It is time to stop talking in circles
It is time to stop blaming and pointing
It is time to stop questioning and guessing
…It is time to accept the burden and act.
We are not blameless
We are not above reproach
We are not perfect role models
…For we are the generation they emulate.
Look beyond your own circle of life
Look beyond your picket fences and chained doors
Look beyond your own backyard
…And admit your frailties and failures.
Did you not once look the other way?
Did you not once stay quiet when you should have spoken?
Did you not once say I can not change it?
…Do you know that we can make a difference?
One small voice can begin to move mountains
One caring gesture can begin to enlighten others
One shoulder to lean on can ease another’s pain
…Did you know that you are that one?
Listen to those who are in jeopardy
Listen to that small voice whispering that they are in trouble
Listen to that child with the wayward furtive glance
…And be prepared to take part in their future.
For if you do not listen and talk
If you do not participate and take responsibility
If you do not guide and offer them your heart and wisdom
…It is we, who will join in their misery.
It reaches beyond your own immediate children
It reaches beyond their friends and peers
It reaches beyond their nieces and nephews
…For it is every child you come in contact with.
Positive action begins in our own backyard
Positive action flows through your own neighbourhood
Positive action can encompass your own small town and city
…And through this, we are all connected.
Be a mentor when others fail to counsel
Be a counsellor when others fail to listen
Be a listener when others fail to notice
…Be a positive experience with every child you meet.
For yesterday, someone looked the other way
Yesterday, someone pretended they did not see
Yesterday, someone passed by without offering help
…But today, it is not too late.
Today, you can make a difference in someone’s life
Today, you can offer your love and guidance
Today, you can choose to be a positive influence for another
…And then maybe, just maybe, our world will change you.
May we all have a most fruitful year ahead!
Today, especially today as we greet the dawn of a brand new year I wish to share this meaningful poem (posted by my friend Julie) here :
Another Day Has Dawned by Kit Callum
Amidst our chaos and confusion
Amidst our anguish and despair
Amidst our ever-ending questions and blame
…Lies a world of lessons.
Through our tears and astonishment
Through our hopelessness and desperations
Through our anxiety and grief
…Lies a world of shame.
For it is our world that is responsible
It is our world that allowed this sadness
It is our world that has lost its youth
…And it is our world that needs to change.
It is a warning for those who would isolate it
It is a warning for those who would bury it
It is a warning for those who think it will not touch them
…It is we, who need to address it.
For this is the birth of our own generation
This is the birth of our own problems
This is the birth of our own mistakes
…It is we, who needed to watch over them.
A new generation who have hopes and dreams
A new generation who have life and laughter
A new generation who deserve a chance at peace
…It is we who need to make them secure.
It is time to stop talking in circles
It is time to stop blaming and pointing
It is time to stop questioning and guessing
…It is time to accept the burden and act.
We are not blameless
We are not above reproach
We are not perfect role models
…For we are the generation they emulate.
Look beyond your own circle of life
Look beyond your picket fences and chained doors
Look beyond your own backyard
…And admit your frailties and failures.
Did you not once look the other way?
Did you not once stay quiet when you should have spoken?
Did you not once say I can not change it?
…Do you know that we can make a difference?
One small voice can begin to move mountains
One caring gesture can begin to enlighten others
One shoulder to lean on can ease another’s pain
…Did you know that you are that one?
Listen to those who are in jeopardy
Listen to that small voice whispering that they are in trouble
Listen to that child with the wayward furtive glance
…And be prepared to take part in their future.
For if you do not listen and talk
If you do not participate and take responsibility
If you do not guide and offer them your heart and wisdom
…It is we, who will join in their misery.
It reaches beyond your own immediate children
It reaches beyond their friends and peers
It reaches beyond their nieces and nephews
…For it is every child you come in contact with.
Positive action begins in our own backyard
Positive action flows through your own neighbourhood
Positive action can encompass your own small town and city
…And through this, we are all connected.
Be a mentor when others fail to counsel
Be a counsellor when others fail to listen
Be a listener when others fail to notice
…Be a positive experience with every child you meet.
For yesterday, someone looked the other way
Yesterday, someone pretended they did not see
Yesterday, someone passed by without offering help
…But today, it is not too late.
Today, you can make a difference in someone’s life
Today, you can offer your love and guidance
Today, you can choose to be a positive influence for another
…And then maybe, just maybe, our world will change you.
May we all have a most fruitful year ahead!
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